Spank Mistress Tara Speaks!!

Hello there, my devoted fans and beloved playmates. I have a couple of announcements.  First of all, Friday Night Tea Time is no more. There are a couple of reasons, one is that with my new night shift, all I want to do at 6pm on Friday is nap in preparation for the busy night ahead.  The second is that I’ve been doing Tea Time for quite a while now, and while I LOVE my sweet regular guests (dear little wings and Ramona, muckamoo, and sometimes even shrimpy), it has gotten kind of routine. I want to offer something fresh and fun. So, I am pleased to tell you that there will be a new hosted Chat on Tuesday nights at 7pm called Tea with Milk and Cookies. I will be hosting this with Ms Natalie and it will be open to sissies of all ages, including little girls and even babies.  As always, we will welcome shrimps, perverted elves, alien fembugs and even boys, if they behave themselves:)

My second announcement is that my radio show is on haitus, in case you haven’t guessed, until I can decide how to make it part of my new schedule. I miss doing my show and talking to everyone, not to mention all that great singing and inflicti.. I mean, sharing my unique musical touch with my audience, so I should be back on the air soon. I’ll be announcing the new schedule here, so hang in there and I’ll be back on the air and singing to you in my dulcet tones very soon.

Hugs,

Miss Tara

Now, them that know me know that I adore my sissies, but I’m just not cut out to be a mommy to sissy babies. It’s not that they aren’t sweet, because we have a lot of sweet ones in chat. But the Spankmistress just can’t handle the way so many of our babies are fascinated with the contents of their diapers.  I’m not saying there is anything wrong with the way they like to play, it just isn’t for me. But last night, my Auntie heart was charmed by the one of the most adorable little sissy babies to come along (or not to cum along!!) in a long time. Princess Grace was in a very sociable mood and wanting to reach out to some of our newer ladies for a two mistress call, she wanted to share one of her favourite boys and expand his Mistress horizon.  (I have to say, she was showing good taste, by reaching out to two of my favourite ladies, the charming Ms. Corrine and the exquisite, long legged Ms. Ryan - both of whom I can vouch for when it comes to two mistress calls.) But she was unable to reach them and, really wanting to share, my long time friend decided that she’d have fun with someone she knew instead, your beloved Spankmistress Tara. Princess Grace and I have done many duo calls over the years and we always have fun. Tonight she had a caller I had actually spoken with before, little Banky Boo aka the Silly Old Man.

Now, I’ve always enjoyed Banky Boo, whom Grace calls boo boo when he’s in baby mode.  He has called me and I’ve had so much fun making fun of his itty bitty little pee pee, he revels in his humiliation and he’s so cheerful. He tries vainly to convince the various mistresses that he is a “real man” and I just laugh as he leads off with his tiny cock size and the fact that he wears pink panties. Well, during my call with Princess Grace, he was wearing diapers. And a lacy baby bonnet with long pink satin ribbons (the only thing long and pink on me are my ribbons, Miss Tara!), plus his pacifier. We got him on webcam and that sweet smiling face just captured my heart. I fell in love with a sissy baby. oh, I didn’t stop tormenting him about his little stubbie, and laughing at his bitty boo boo antics, but that grin just made me want to pinch his widdle cheeks and spank his bottom. And it won’t stop me from spreading the lovely Egyptian cotton sheets he bought me as a token of his appreciation, and telling him about how the REAL MEN who fuck me on them are pleasing me in a way his little itty bitty never could. Real Men are for fabulous fucks and little booboos with long pink ribbons are for making lovely women laugh and shopping wishlists for  wonderful presents to pamper those lovely women. That’s just the way it is and it suits this phone sex mistress just fine!!

hugs,

Miss Tara

The Spankmistress has smart friends and I’m beginning to regret it. It’s causing me to make a LOT of apologies when someone I respect recommends something in which I have very little interest. Because, I always seem to end up TRYING it after all and dammit, I usually love it. So then I have to go back and ADMIT that they were right- can you believe that they start assuming I was WRONG? And that I should apologize for ever doubting their superior judgement.  Smart and smug, those are my friends.  I had to do it, twice, with my sister, who recommended both Pitch Black (introducing me to the incomparable Vin Diesel as Riddick) and The West Wing. She’ll never let me forget it, because I was instantly hooked on them both. And now, freakin’ BillyBear. I’m going to have to betray my allegience to a classic science fiction icon and admit that the new reinterpretation of Battlestar Galactica is compelling and brilliant. That I watched the three hour miniseries and four episodes of the show in one day, that I immediately went and added everthing BSG to my Netflix. And that I made a special trip to the mailbox today to send back my movies so I could get new episodes as soon as possible.  So, I admit it. BillyBear, you were right. Battlestar Galactica is fabulous. Let the smugness begin:)

I’ve recently had the pleasure of sharing a lot of two Mistress calls with Ms Corrine. She enjoys sissies as much as I do, and holds to my theory that a phone sex call with multiple mistresses is always a party! She’s a generous lady, as all of our ladies are, who loves to share her favourite callers with other mistresses and give her devoted callers the thrill of being shared like a treasured toy.:) This fits right in with the resurgance of a game we call “pass the penis”, where a caller (stroker, sissy or cuckold, any fantasy can be worked in!) is passed from mistress to mistress over the course of an hour or two, and subject to the will of every woman who plays with him!!

If you’d like to be shared, by two ladies enjoying a close intimate call or by the whole group of ladies available of an evening, call 1-800-356-6169.

hugs,

Miss Tara

I love the Food Network, and I particularly love Iron Chef, which is back on the Fine Living Network now. I try to catch it most nights, I love the dishes and I love the competition. Competition shows, like this one and American Gladiators, always seem to spark off an idea for our own version. The Iron Mistresses. A team of the best the world of phone sex has to offer, each with her own speciality. Iron Mistress Cruel Domination, Iron Mistress Forced Cocksucker, etc. The shaking contestant would be led into a private phone room where he could choose the Mistress to … fuck it, we have this already. We ARE the Iron Mistresses! All anyone has to do is pick up the phone and dial to get the mistress who suits his fantasy best, the only thing the Iron Mistress program would do is preselect her. And our callers can always ask our Amazing Dispatchers to recommend the right lady for his particular needs. 

I’ve been enjoying a lot of two girl calls lately with the incredible Ms Corrine. If you haven’t had a chance to speak to her yet, get to it!! She is the most delicate looking blonde, but that sweet voice has a thread of pure steel in it, and if you ever cross her, she’ll lash you without mercy. I had the pleasure of watching (via webcam) and partcipating in the punishment of one of her sissies that got uppity with her and had to be taught a severe lesson. I tell you, it was so amusing, I nearly laughed myself sick

That’s right, little sissies, strokers, teeny weenies and all my other little pets, the SpankMistress has returned!! To the world of blogging, I mean, my vacation was over about two weeks ago:) But, I’ve been lazy. I’m still trying to figure out what my new schedule is really going be to be. So, the blogging went by the wayside as I got used to taking calls and sorting things out here at home. I did spend some time commenting on Billy and Jemmie’s blogs.. because Billy is now a shrinking Hulk or something and Jemmie is just too cute:)

First of all, my vacation was all that I could have wanted. From the arrival at Enterprise, where I discovered I’d gotten a free upgrade to a sweet black metallic 2008 Dodge Charger, to the incredibly beautiful house that Ms Ally rented for us and the serenity of the lovely setting for the house, it couldn’t have been more wonderful. We had a private pool as well and a deck that overlooked the ocean, such a pleasant place to sit and talk and think.  Mr Ally and Mr Trish were there as usual, making us laugh and taking good care of us, after all, it’s not like the ladies of LDW go on vacation to WORK!! (Although we discovered Ms Hannah is an amazing cook when she made us a Mexican dinner one night!).  A fishing boat is always part of the beach vacation, but this year it was a pontoon boat and I actually went along for a few hours. I’m not a fisher, but I love being on the water and that boat was SO comfortable! We soaked up the sun, I read one of my many vacation books, and in general had a great time. I think the boat was my favourite afternoon, and there were a lot of good ones! I had the pleasure of meeting Ms Lilith and Ms Natalie in person this year, such a treat! That darn Ms Natalie waited until the night before I left to come, the wicked minx! I would have LOVED to spend more time getting to know her, especially since she is so busy now that we are back here at work! And I was unable to go to lunch with her the day I left because I was in search of a fabulous gift shop to buy souveniers for my fambly - the good part is that I DID find one. The Blue Giraffe was incredible, I even called them a week later and ordered a certain item I didn’t buy as a gift for my housemate’s birthday:) All and all, this year’s beach trip was exactly what I needed and I consider myself very blessed to be associated with a woman like Ms Ally, who provides this kind of bonding experience for her ladies.

So, after a perfect vacation, I’m back to my phone sex world and I’m GLAD to be back here. I want to hear your fantasies, your shameful secrets, and all about how getting naked in front of beautifully dressed women makes you tremble with embarassment and desire! And, as always, your wildest roleplay ideas are what I want to hear most of all!!

Hugs,

Miss Tara

800-356-6169

Reality bites, for the most part. I prefer fantasy. One of the great things about being in the phone sex biz is that I meet a LOT of people who have excellent fantasy lives as well.  I know I’ve rambled about the nature of fantasy and reality before, but bear with me, it’s been a while Fantasy, for instance, is such a malleable word. It can mean a very simple (to me) idea like “I want to masturbate in front of a woman who likes watching a man get off.” This, to me, seems like something that could be very doable in person as well. I’m not saying it’s not a fun fantasy, because it IS,  there is something very appealing about a man willing to have a woman witness something so personal and private as stroking himself to an orgasm.  But, I hope, that the man who has this fantasy will share it with his partner and get to live it out in person if he wishes.

Then there are the wild fantasies. The ones about women growing huge watermelon like breasts at a certain point of the month, or year, or when their hormones kick in, or the women themselves growing until they block out the sun and, as a giantess, can crush the men who worship them with a careless step. Fantasies about having your best woman friend there when your time comes on Death Row, of having a smartass kick ass female sheriff bust your trashy con-girl criminal ass all over the jail, insulting you all the while, because she can.  These are great, but not likely to happen in real life. Does that make them any less valid or sexy or needed? Hell no. To be honest, these are my favourite types of fantasies. As I said, I have nothing against reality, but DAMN!! This kind of fantasy requires an extra level of creativity and acting - I’ve come out of some of them emotionally drained. I believe in giving my callers the best that I can, and sometimes they pull my ass through the wringer with them. And thats okay, I welcome the challenge.

And, maybe most fun, if not profitable, are the incredibly creative chatters and bloggers I’ve met because of this profession. Billy and Jemmie are Princess Grace’s pets, but they are my friends and playpals and we have a lot of fun making up outrageous scenarios in the chat rooms and on each other’s blogs (less so on mine, as I do try to keep it interesting for everyone, and our little adventures might strike some as rather wacky!!) and commenting with a fine edge of sarcasm and insult that I’ve seldom experienced with anyone but my close friends. There is a lil girly flutterbye who has captured my heart in her little jeweled wings. A certain noble shrimp, a Tiger turned cookie maven, a certain lucky bastard, and a trivia guru named magnus who just delights me with being himself…if I wasn’t open to a little weirdness and make believe, I’d never have appreciated these good folk. That would have been a damn shame.

So, with that, I’m off on my vacation. Try not to stake anyone while I’m gone, buffyBilly and remember that I’m NOT a vampire. But you can still be my minion, magnus. Have fun everyone and I’ll be back on the 21st, so get ready for a rested and ready to wrassle Miss Tara!!

Hugs

Miss Tara

As you may or may not know, the fabulous (and luscious and sexy and my girlie love) Princess Heather hosts her Flashback Friday radio show every Friday night at ten pm est. She plays amazing eighties music, including some wonderful Dr Demento and novelty hits that make me smile.. and some WHAM! to make tonydshrimp cringe on all his 147 legs:) She always played a Totally Twisted Triva game (it has a longer title but I’m so besotted with her giggle that I never hear the whole thing:) that assigns each question a value, in strokers. Oh yes, the stroker boys LOVE Princess Heather’s show! The twisted trivia is all from the eighties too. Now, I used to attend just because it was an amazing dance party with lots of fun and great music. But, I can’t resist trivia and I don’t approve of boy cummies, so when I found myself in the midst of this trivia game, I HAD to answer. And, since Miss Tara never assists a stroker in his pursuit of cummies, I had to add my own little twist. I declared that if I, a Mistress, answered a question correctly before the masturbating masses, they were DENIED their strokies for that question!! Fortunately, my girlie love loved the idea and enthusiastically declared me the COCK BLOCKER. Ahhh, she encouraged me to take my lone stand against the eager palm pumpers, and cheered me when I won. It was pretty fun, actually. I have discovered both my competitive nature AND a real talent for being a bad sport, which I find very amusing. I curse and bitch when the occasional cheating/lucky stroker wins a question, I gloat and rub it in their faces with a dance and a big DENIED when I win.  LOL, somehow, this seems to amuse the other players too, so bless their little hearts.  This, of course, resulted in an immediate division, Team Stroker and Team Denial, of which I am the self appointed Captain:) I started urging other mistresses to come and play the game, and when I can’t be there myself, I know that most of the time, the other members of Team Denial are in there distracting Team Stroker and frustrating their little wanking wishes. It brings a sweet tear to my eye.

So come out to Flashback Fridays sometime and not only will you fall in love with the lovely Princess Heather, you’ll meet a lot of other great Mistresses and experience the scorn of the SpankMistress! How can you resist? And hell, you might even get to wank your crank!!

Participants make all the difference when doing our radio shows. I just love cock radio when it’s going well and when I have a room full of disruptive or self absorbed hoe-dads, I just hate it. I sort of tuned in to do an hour of the show Wednesday, because in this week before I head out on vacation and get used to the night shift, I’m really all over the place. But, I signed on to do it Wednesday around seven pm and what a surprise!! Four other mistresses in the main chat room with a slew of folks, having fun, and they just pulled me in to have fun with them. Usually I do my show from the chat room titled “Cock radio”, so that hopefully the only people in there would be ones that want to be part of the show. But, I was having so much fun , I didn’t want to leave and they didn’t seem to want me to leave:) I outed our darling Mistress of Mean Elizabeth as SHARKBAIT - her vacation name, and found out that she just might make our vacation in Florida after all -YAY!! I played music, joked on the air, and had much fun. It was serendipitous all around.

I was really tired on Thursday, but a very sweet shrimp IMed me and asked if I was going to be doing my show, and, what can I say? I have a weakness for witty crustaceans. It’s hard to blow off one’s scheduled appearance if you know someone wants to see you. So I came on to do the show, and I thought I’d do it from sissy school, which was a disaster. Quite frankly, we have some chatters who flagrantly disregard the few rules we have for the chatrooms and it’s impossible to do my show and babysit at the same time. I was pretty pissed of, to be honest. So, I took a deep breath and moved to the cock radio chatroom, shrimpy came with me, and a great group ended up joining us there.  Unfortunately, I couldn’t enjoy it as much as I wanted to, because my phone kept ringing, but they had me in stitches and telling stories and playing a very eclectic mix of music.

So, for me, it’s all about the people I’m in the room with. If I get a good rowdy group, I never want my show to end. I’ll stay and talk and play music until I’m out of material:) And, if I do end up moving my show to the middle of my new shift, I hope I find a new cast of characters to come play and make the show fun.

By the way: BillyBear of the Daily Assassin  has made it his purpose to slander me daily in his blog. He insists that I am Vampyre, a Creature of the Darkness, Undead Queen of the Night. And that I’m a blooddrinker and killer! LIES, all LIES. The fact that my search for an attorney to sue his furry blue ass for defamation and libel only includes those who work at night has just nothing to do with my being undead. Has anyone noticed that buffyBilly has no neck?

Hugs,

Miss Tara

YOU! That’s right, you, with the itty bitty package. Just step away from the bar and come over here. I’m holding penis inspection  tonight and you haven’t been measured yet. I know you haven’t, I don’t see your hand stamp. THAT hand stamp tells me you are over 21 and paid the cover charge, it says nothing about whether you are packing a useless tiny little wee willie in your pants. Small penis deception disappoints and angers more women every year than any other man related problem. So, drop your trousers and lets get on with this, shall we? What, you’re offended? You think this is humiliating? Well, I’m certainly getting the mini dick vibe off you now!  Males with big cocks, real men, aren’t afraid to whip their meat out and show it to a woman. You’re squirming like a itty bitty bug under a great big microscope. What are you afraid of? I’ve seen plenty of man meat, don’t worry about that! So, show me. You aren’t getting back to the bar, or out of here now, without having it measured for the sake of all the women you might meet tonight. I don’t care if you think this is crazy or not, I’m not the only one in the bars now, doing this. Pretty soon there is going to be eensy weensy peensy inspectors in all places where men try to pick up women, she’ll be able to ask for his stamp to know if he’s worth her time. Oh, that offends you?  Women love the size of your dick? You can tell those phone sex operators anything you want, loser. But you men can tell at a glance if a women has what you like, big tits, nice ass, plush lips. But until now, these poor girls end up with guys who lead them on, date them, act charming and fun and then on the big night, she’s expecting fireworks and she gets a damp fizzling firecracker. The tiny little blue and white ones.  Yeah. So when a woman is thinking she’s going to have a gourmet meal and she ends up with a cock mcnugget, it pisses her off AND it leaves  her sexually frustrated. AND she has to deal with the deceitful little fucknut whining about wanting to get his little stubby chubby off. As if any woman wants to deal with something that insignificant at any point in her life.  He should have the decency to just stay home and masturbate alone.

This is the new order of business, buddy boy. Now drop them or the two ladies here will restrain you and I’ll reach in and measure it myself. Grab him girls!!! Now, lets get that belt off - STOP SQUIRMING- and those pants down, you’re attracting quite the crowd of onlookers with your yelling, bubba. All these girls are going to see your -WHOA!! Oh yeah, that’s an itty bitty all right, it can’t be more than three inches at most. Stamp his hand “T” for Tiny, ladies, and I’m going to stamp his little dickie too, for all the trouble he’s given me tonight, in bright blue ink. I hope your balls are the same color after a while, because soon every woman in the city will know better than to give you even the hope of a fuck!! So long, shortie!!

Coming soon to YOUR local bar:)

Miss Tara

I had the nicest comment made to me this morning. A fellow IMed me to find out when I’d be available to chat again, because he had been reading my blog and he loved it. I put so much of myself into my blog, when someone tells me it’s smart and funny, I am SO inclined to think well of him:) What can I say? I’m not modest at all when it comes to my blog. I know it’s (what a lovely word, BillyBear) quirky and sometimes it’s downright goofy, but I know it’s also well written, informative, interesting and even sexy-by turns. It’s my phone sex style, if a man likes my blog, he very likely will LOVE doing calls with me. LOL, I’ve always said if a guy doesn’t like to laugh, he shouldn’t call me. I tease everyone, my sissies and my cuckolds and my little teeny weenies, especally if I like them. My regulars know that I love to laugh and I love to make my callers laugh too. I’m not afraid to be silly. Those who have been treated to my lovely singing on my radio show know this to be true:)

My sissies would be enjoying the preparations for my trip as much as I am. It’s been filled with SHOPPING!! Material for a couple of fun free skirts, like sarongs to wear at the pool, new sunscreen to keep me from becoming lobster girl, and I dumped all my old make up for a new fresh set from Beauticontrol. I’ve got my little travel bottle of FlowerBomb (the official perfume of LDW) and a couple of bottles of my favourite clear polish. Pretty new undies and new shirts and this fabulous little cotton jumper. But unlike Ally, who wears the most exotic and adorable high heeled shoes, I’m only bringing my sneaks and my Mickey Crocs.  Comfort is my imperative on vacation.

Until I leave, however, my imperative is taking your calls, answering your emails and talking to you in chat, so please, keep ‘em coming. You can set up an appointment at tarasaysbadboy@aol.com, and you can always reach me at 800-356-6169.  Just ask one of our Amazing Dispatchers ™ for Miss Tara and we’ll have a really good time:)

Hugs,

Miss Tara